Vermont's finest.

I have been a bad blogger. Every so often I get plagued with enormous apathy and everything becomes mundane, useless, petty. I usually manage to climb out of that after a while, either by force or desperation. This is a little of both.

I have left the house only twice in the last two weeks. Joel is off on a snow mobiling adventure with his brother, and he left his car here. So I could have left today. That option hasn't been available to me in the many weeks since my car shat the bed. But as I weighed out that possibility, the task suddenly became too daunting. I am now officially a recluse. My car should be in tip top shape fairly soon, once our refund is in hand and Joel actually takes the time to get to it. But even then - where would I go?

I might go crawling back to my former place of employment soon. For a few nights a week or something. Although this is a terrible time of year for the restaurant business to be hiring anyone. I doubt they'd even take me back right now. I need to figure out what the hell it is I'd like to do with myself someday. Or do I?! I am so beyond sick of torturing myself with that question.

All I know is that I want to buy a house. We started looking into it, researching the area and whatnot. Working on a plan. It's ultimately my one big goal in life, to own a house that we will treasure as a big family with lots of memories. I don't really care how lame that might sound to most everyone else but the desire for it is a passion, and that feeling doesn't happen easily for me so I'm holding onto it.

I am polishing off Joel's Cherry Garcia. The fool left it behind. Muahaha.