Lonesome

I do stupid, silly things when I'm left alone for too long. And that's been happening quite often lately. Getting pretty sick of it, for reals.




Today is my mom's birthday. Yesterday we had a nice family dinner. Whenever there's an event that requires a gathering of the fam, even if it's solely for the purpose of her, she cooks. Her birthday? She cooks. Mother's Day? She cooks. But I know that's secretly how she wants it. She's happiest when she's providing. As long as everyone is there, that's all that matters. I guess it's a mom thing.

Yesterday was also the one year anniversary of finding out I was pregnant. I can remember that whole day perfectly. I had written about it in my little portable diary I carry around with me everywhere...

"the day i found out i was pregnant with you was a tuesday. the weather was perfect and the colors were changing. at first i was extremely happy, but then i cried my eyes out. i became very scared. without health insurance or any money to even take care of you before you were born, i felt like it would be impossible to make this work. i told your father that night. it was cold out but the sky was clear and the moon was waxing. we spoke over hot chocolate."

The birth story is almost done.